Fat

My zippers bust,

My buckles break,

I'm too much man for you to take.

The pavement cracks when I fall down

I've got more chins than Chinatown.

When I go out to get my mail,

It measures on the Richter Scale.

Down at the beach I'm a lucky man,

I'm the only one who gets a tan.

Don't you call me pudgy, portly or stout

Let me tell you once again

Who's fat?